Confession #59: The SUV-sedan is the strangest combination that won't go away

Most wagon fans have come to terms as much as possible with jacked-up wagons, if only as a way of keeping the breed alive somehow. With successes like the Subaru Outback, you can't really argue with it – and it's about all of the SUV many, many people need.

But the offshoot of this wagon-with-cladding trend is the curious sedan-with-cladding, the likes of which haven't been seen since 2007. Thanks to Volvo and the S60 Cross Country, it's back and as charmingly confusing as ever.

Confession #58: Mercedes now makes the wildest hot hatches, or whatever they're called

Look, Daimler. I don't know where you're hiding the old Mercedes-Benz, but I'm starting not to care. I longed for the days of the stoic W124s, but Stuttgart has embraced its lunatic side and it's having startlingly seductive results.

Case in point is the newly announced Mercedes CLA45 AMG Shooting Brake. Dear God, it's pretty much everything I've ever wanted.

Confession #54: The new Volvo XC90 is slick, not outrageous – and that's perfect

New Volvo XC90 (Photos: Volvo Cars)

I really hoped Volvo would stick some splashes of orange trim on the production 2016 Volvo XC90, like they had on the Volvo Concept XC Coupe. I really hoped the new XC90 would have tweed upholstery and orange seatbelts like the Volvo Concept Estate.

The new XC90 doesn't have any of these things.

Probably the most interesting thing on the totally new XC90 crossover will be the crystal gearshift and little Swedish flag tags on the seats. Many of us are disappointed after the months and months of teasing, but I think I'm fine with this new Volvo. In an age of tacky LEDs and vents and pointless swooshes everywhere in car design, this is a clean, simple design. It's a Volvo, and that's a good thing here.

Confession #49: New cars are just like old cars

The Honda CR-V offers just about anything anyone could ask from a car, as long as you're not someone who particularly likes cars. And even if you do, you can respect it. Really, that's a rare thing.

I've had a theory for a while now that the CR-V is the modern day Volvo 240. Last produced 21 years ago, Volvo never replaced the 240 wagon with anything as utilitarian, so that sent people who cared far more about practicality and longevity than badge snobbery. It's a car people only get rid of when the smells inside of it become too difficult to live with.

Confession #47: There aren't enough selfish people anymore to buy two-door cars

Photo: Honda

Just because a car only has one door on each side doesn't make it sexier than something that has four. But try telling this to people who insist on only having two-doors. Like a surprising amount of people I've known in my life. They tend to be single, or divorced, or childless, or not very practical. Selfish is probably too strong of a word, but it's something along those lines.

Perhaps it's the more pragmatic times we're living in these days that are making people a little more caring – caring enough to buy more and more vehicles with four doors and at least two rows of seats. And that's killing the (relatively) inexpensive two-door car. That includes coupes and convertibles.

Confession #24: Impulsive, non-committal type seeks functional, fast wagon for friendship

(Saab Automobile AB photo)

Wagons are perfect for someone who favors diplomatic decisions over democratic ones. And even for someone who wants a quick escape, just in case the choice doesn't work.

Take a detour to Ikea one Saturday? You can spend hundreds of dollars in assemble-yourself furniture and spend the rest of the weekend scratching your head and screaming at an Allen wrench. And then return it in pieces the following weekend while trying to keep the rage to a minimum at the customer service desk.

Have you just started scuba sessions? Dozens of oxygen tanks will fit without drama.

Confession #18: Small Cars Part 2 – Is this a country for super-small SUV?

2011 Mini Cooper S All4 Countryman
(Mini USA photo)

I walked past a Mini Countryman the other day. It was a strange sight in a snow-covered parking lot in Boston, mostly filled by weather-beaten small domestics, Saabs, Subarus, Volvos, and the occasional Audi A5 or Q5 that has somehow managed to stay cleaner than everything else.

There are even some standard Minis parked there and even then, the Countryman doesn’t blend in quite right, and not because this example looked pristine under the dim sunlight of a freezing January afternoon. It’s not small like a Mini or even another small hatch. But compared to the muddy Ford Explorer planted a few spaces away, it’s miniscule, no pun intended.

2010 Volkswagen Golf 3-door
(Volkswagen photo)

What never quite clicked with the Countryman and me was this: You buy a Mini because it’s compact, and you buy a small SUV/crossover either because it’s smaller than a big one or it’s all you can afford.

The Countryman is small. But at more than four meters (or 13 feet) long, it’s about the length of a Volkswagen Golf. And it’s at least 12 inches longer than the normal Mini, so it’s firmly into the “normal size” of a modern car.

Is it the normal length of an SUV? Hardly.